Catholic UnCharity

Browsing the blogosphere, I see two types of response to the Catholic Charities decision.

One I dread, as a "cultural Catholic" old enough to remember when anti-Catholic bigotry was very real. It comes from non-Catholics who have always believed, deep down, that "they" are always like this, always ready to turn away from compassion and care in favour of blind obedience and ritual. That belief runs like a quiet, polluted current deep beneath the surface of careful discourse.

The other comes from the Catholic Church of the laity, expressing some degree of pain or highly personal turmoil at this latest outrage against the commandment to love your neighbour as yourself. It's become trite to say "I feel your pain." I feel this pain. It is my own.

I do not believe non-Catholics can fully understand the conflict, can appreciate why everyone doesn't just leave, or why when you do leave, you find that in certain ways you haven't. I suspect that it's especially hard for the tens of thousands of current and former Catholics who, as I do, have Catholic Charities somewhere in their family tree.

All the same, I'm not coming back. I left the audience, going nowhere in particular. Instead of sitting in front of the magic show, I found myself in the wings. At last, from this different perspective, I could see the reality behind all the sleight-of-hand. I paid attention to the man behind the curtain, and understood that even he wasn't there. As long as the illusions made the leaders and the led care for their fellow beings equally, they were fine. They do so no longer: doctrine has become just a blueprint for hate and excuses. The time has come for humanity to cast off this mental crutch and find out that we can stand on our own.