Opportunity knocks

I do believe I scent one of those career choices that are supposed to appear in hard times. We have speech writers and lawyers and spin doctors. What the world needs now, obviously, is a consultant in cover story management.

First we had the NWA pilots with the story a day gambit, until they fessed up to the worst possible sin: deliberate violation of regulations by using their laptops in the cockpit. They clearly needed help with their cover stories, and advice on coming up with one that would shift the blame off them. Although I have my eye on this career path, if you read the comments here, you'll see one suggesting carbon monoxide in the cockpit. Now that is an A-plus cover story!

Now we have the South Carolina assistant (or whatever) attorney general, age 66, caught in a car in a cemetery with sex toys, Viagra and an 18-year-old-stripper: in broad (if you'll pardon the expression) daylight. The cover story consultant would tell them to be sure they were paying their respects to (fill in the blank). The need only note the name on the nearest headstone and use it to fill in the blank, then describe the departed as a dear friend. Get that one down pat and it's end of story when the interruption happens.

Needless to say the woods would have been a much better choice for screwing around, but for that they will need the services of a choice advisor. Catbert, move over!