Of course its our fault
Here in sunny Massachusetts we're once again having one of those oh-so-pious debates about bullying, because an Irish girl new to her school was harassed 24/7 until she committed suicide and because, as always, not one single "adult" close to the problem had the spine to prevent it.
Now, as always, we have Expert Opinion jumping into the question. They reach into the top hat and hey, presto! It happens because it's the victim's fault. We're going to fix the problem by making sure that the people who get bullied become passive conformists and enablers of the rage and violence of the people doing the bullying.
First, as I've said numbers of times here, the bullying that causes kids to bring home-made bombs and automatic weapons to school, or that causes them to hang themselves in a closet with electrical cord, has long since gone past the occasional wise-ass remark or classroom snicker. By the time these things happened, the bullying has escalated to round-the-clock verbal and physical abuse. Parents of victims do nothing because they never think it's serious. Parents of bulliers do nothing because their little darling could NEVER. School officials do nothing because they are cowed by such Expert Opinion as this, and because they are themselves afraid of the legal bullying that parents of bulliers can pull off, absent statute law that forces the officials to act. In this case, I'm not playing a bullying victim on TV. I was one.
So sorry, experts: hanging yourself with an electrical cord is a very nasty death: ask the cops or EMTs who have to take down the body. Blowing away half your school appears to have only momentary satisfaction. These things don't happen because a kid's feelings got hurt, or because they misread some non-verbal cue that says something like "I'm gonna beat the crap out of you because I feel like it." They happen because of abuse, abuse, abuse. And experts still don't get that because of denial, denial, denial.
Now excuse me whilst I go puke in a wastebasket and purge myself of the stupidity of the human race.
Now, as always, we have Expert Opinion jumping into the question. They reach into the top hat and hey, presto! It happens because it's the victim's fault. We're going to fix the problem by making sure that the people who get bullied become passive conformists and enablers of the rage and violence of the people doing the bullying.
First, as I've said numbers of times here, the bullying that causes kids to bring home-made bombs and automatic weapons to school, or that causes them to hang themselves in a closet with electrical cord, has long since gone past the occasional wise-ass remark or classroom snicker. By the time these things happened, the bullying has escalated to round-the-clock verbal and physical abuse. Parents of victims do nothing because they never think it's serious. Parents of bulliers do nothing because their little darling could NEVER. School officials do nothing because they are cowed by such Expert Opinion as this, and because they are themselves afraid of the legal bullying that parents of bulliers can pull off, absent statute law that forces the officials to act. In this case, I'm not playing a bullying victim on TV. I was one.
So sorry, experts: hanging yourself with an electrical cord is a very nasty death: ask the cops or EMTs who have to take down the body. Blowing away half your school appears to have only momentary satisfaction. These things don't happen because a kid's feelings got hurt, or because they misread some non-verbal cue that says something like "I'm gonna beat the crap out of you because I feel like it." They happen because of abuse, abuse, abuse. And experts still don't get that because of denial, denial, denial.
Now excuse me whilst I go puke in a wastebasket and purge myself of the stupidity of the human race.
Labels: bullying, expert opinion
posted by Uncle | 19:56
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